Tom Ford and the love of his life, Richard Buckley are on the cover of Out Magazine and in it they talk about their lovely relationship.
Tom on meeting Richard and how he knew he was the one:
“He was adorable, and he was a complete fool. He was sort of dancing around, flashing his eyes at me, and trying so hard to be charming. I decided in that elevator ride that I was going to marry him. I’m very pragmatic, and I was, like, OK, there’s some kind of connection here. He ticked every box, and — boom — by the time we got to the floor, I was like, OK, sold. He seemed so together. He was so handsome, he was so connected, he was so grown-up, so he was very intimidating. And he really chased me — not that he had to chase that hard. It excited me but it also scared me, because I knew he was different and that whatever it was I felt with him was very different from what I’d felt before.”
Tom on settling down, losing his virginity and getting a girl pregnant twice when he was a teen:
“He [Richard] had come to that stage of his life at age 38, and I was at that stage at age 25, but we were both ready to settle down and fall in love and have a life with someone. I had slept with a lot of people and done my fair share of drinking and dancing and drugs. I’d had sex for the first time when I was 14. I had a girlfriend in high school who was pregnant twice while we were together. In those days, in the ’70s, abortion was considered a form of birth control, and I think in most high schools at the time, it was quite casual. I certainly wouldn’t do that if I were with someone today, even as a teenager, so I think it was a part of that era, and the casualness with which sex was treated on television. When you watch an old ’70s television show, everyone is just hopping into bed with everyone in a completely casual way. I think AIDS definitely changed it.”
Tom on lasting 24 years with Richard and monogamy in gay relationships:
“One of the things that always amuses me – amuses isn’t even the right word, because it doesn’t amuse me — but often, I’m at dinner parties with very close friends, straight, and they realize that Richard and I have been together 24 years, and the response is often, “Wow, you guys have been together 24 years! That’s so amazing. I don’t think of gay men being together that long.” And I’m, like, “Why? What are you talking about?” Some of the longest relationships I know of are same-sex couples. A lot of my straight friends have married and divorced and married and divorced in the time Richard and I have been together. I think that preconception, from even very educated liberal friends, that being gay is possibly more sex-based than emotionally based, is surprising and shocking in today’s world. I’m someone who likes being part of a couple and always wanted that and always sought that, and it would probably be true for me whether I was gay or straight. Richard and I are bound together, and I think that’s what that recognition is when you look someone in the eyes and you feel like you’ve known them forever. It is a kind of coming home.”
Sigh, so cute. Read more in Out Magazine.