Lessons We Learned from Romy and Michele's High School Reunion
Romy and Michele's High School Reunion is basically one of the most inspirational films of all time. Like most inspiring works of art, there are lessons to be learned and feelings to be evoked from them.
1. Everyone seriously needs one down-ass friend in life. Your BFF, sister from another mister — whatever you wanna call her — every girl needs a confidant that's supportive and won't judge them. You know, that one friend you can show your cray to and she won't even think you're being insane.
2. Blondes look way better when they're a little rooty on top. They were low-key on the ombre train before all of us.
3. You can still be cutting edge and dope AF no matter what physical ailments you may have. A backbrace? Some fat in places? No problem. Romy and Michele slayed regardless and so can you.
4. Beware of a guy in a good suit because he might just be a suit sales person. Dudes are always trying to be low-key sneaky in suits. Like, "Let me throw on this suit real quick for shits and giggles to see how many chicks think I'm a dimepiece." Never bank on the dude in a suit being a cute lawyer or something. I mean, he might have just left court BUT, for different reasons if you know what I'm saying.
5. Give no f-cks about what people think. Honestly, as long as you're a good person and living your life, don't let anyone make you feel like crap. You're probably cooler than they are anyway.
6. Don't let stuck up sales bitches get the best of you. Remember that scene in Pretty Woman? Michele was like being super analytical and said, "Yeah - like those salesgirls in Beverly Hills aren't bigger whores than she is." SO TRUE, THOUGH. Like relax little mama, you work here. I'm shopping, don't get it twisted.
7. There is no point to still be obsessed with your high school crush and think you might become a thing at your reunion. Odds are he's a scumbag like Billy Christiansen anyway. Sloppy, horny, gross – not that cute little bae you remember at all.
8. You don't have to have sex with someone to get what you want. Take Ramon and Romy for example. She needed to borrow his cool whip but he wanted a transaction of the flesh in return. Romy devised a plan that would still make her look like a thot – kind of but, she didn't actually have to sleep with Ramon. This is very questionable advice but, if you give NFs then this might be a better option than actually putting out for something you need. You should actually never really do that, though – TBH.
9. There are no business women's specials anywhere. As cool as they sound, they don't exist. We've searched high and low – none. Don't bank on them being a thing once you enter the work force.
10. Wearing a black, short skirt suit with a french twist is like the most boss bitch outfit. Maybe not anymore but like why didn't business women in the '90s capitalize and actually wear shit like that in real life? I think more girls would want to be business women if they saw more women dress like that growing up.
11. Not being friends with your friend all of the sudden is weird. Like Romy said, "Isn't it weird when you're not friends with your friends anymore? I mean, Michele and I just fell out of touch about two hours ago." How does that even happen? Basically, don't have fall-outs over stupid crap.
12. "What's the point of going if we're not going to impress people?" Netflix culture knows this feel all too well. Basically, if there isn't anyone cool enough to hang with or impress, is there even a point to attend whatever it is you keep getting annoying Facebook event invite notifications for? Probably not.
13. Getting a rejected from a job you're clearly qualified for is bullshit. Remember when Michele was trying to get a job at Versace and was all like, "You know, you really shouldn't let people fill out applications if you don't want them to actually try to get a job here. No, no, that's all I have to say." Like, WHY even?
14. That nice guy that finished last is probably the one that got away. Ah the good guy you just couldn't seem to like back for some reason. Good on paper but, just way too straight edge. Ten years later, you start to think, "Wow, he was so nice, maybe I should have not been such a superficial bitch and given him a chance." Then you find out he is beyond successful like Sandy Frink and, yeah...